stupid tears

gahhhh... so tomorrow i've got the first day of summer gym AND filming, like, right after that. :(

it doesn't help that tomorrow's scene entails me crying. on cue. and i'm a little nervous about it.

i mean if i read the lines right and am in the mood to cry, then i might pull it off. i'm just afraid it won't happen and i'll let everyone down.

so yeah. there's my current problem.

i'm going to go through the scene at least ten times after this, but i'm still going to be nervous.

the scene itself is basically me explaining to the man i love about how my father killed my mother when i was a little kid. my director keeps telling me to become my character and relate it to my life. except the fact that nothing remotely close to this has happened to me before. and i'm not that great of an actress. so yeah. now what?

currently i'm reading the lines slowly and emotionally, all the while picturing all of my favorite students in the situation in the story.

it works up until a certain point. i get teary and i sob a couple of times, but no real tears have been shed. WHAT DO I DO???

man i wish people would still come to my blog and give me advice. any advice. i mean, come on! two of the people on my links are actors.

*deep sigh* but i'm the one who has to do it tomorrow.

i just wish there wasn't so much pressure to get it right.

nervous and a little scared,

tay